stupid enough to fantasize and love a person who cannot love me back.
im a lover among ruins, standing in the
middle of wrecked, deserted and dry land.my heart is being slowly eaten up by my
own pain. maybe, tonight i can cry the loudest cry and shed the painful tears away.
why cant he feel me? feel that i have been loving him for so long, accepted
him the way he is amidst the unusual things that he does.
all my efforts are not even enough.
he was just an illusion that ive created in my heart.
im craving for a new heart. but his face still haunts the very core of mine.
im tired of falling down. i like to run away to a place where i can forget him
or even think that he has never existed.
im hurt. its like my heart has been stabbed several times.
i feel betrayed by my own self. i sat alone thinking. crying. askng.
he will never know. he might never know. how much im willing to love him.
i feel lost. nowhere to go. my heart is lost. it lost its ability to feel. to love. im indifferent now.
as i fall, my heart slowly builds its walls to prevent from breaking again.
why do they always hurt me? is it part of my fate? to get hurt. to lost my love.
to write sad love songs. to hum melancholic melodies. to create grieving poems.
he may never really know. he may never even appreciate it. he never knew me.
he never appreciated me. i was just enjoying myself with the illusion that i created.
i dont want to feel anymore. it always end like this. they always leave me.
like i am just a doll. easy to throw away. id rather be a doll. a doll with no emotions.
cannot feel happiness. cannot feel sorrow. cannot feel love. cannot feel pain.
but i must accept. he's gone. away. with someone. i dont want to ask him anymore about
her.
but still im glad.
im back to reality.
No comments:
Post a Comment